Tonight I'm feeling down. This afternoon I took B to a birthday celebration for the 1-year-old daughter of good friends, and I was reminded again of how awful it feels to be the only single person in a sea of families. "Happy loving couples" everywhere I turned, many with small children. Happy loving families, with their futures ahead of them.
I think B notices, too. Out of the blue at the party she said "Where's my Daddy? I want Daddy to come home." So do I, sweetie. So do I.
All that I can think to write is, I'm so sorry for your terrible loss.
ReplyDeleteYou're in my heart.
That continues to be one of the hardest things for me: School events where both mom and dad just kick me in the gut. Day-to-day school things don't bother me, but the events that bring out the dads just tear me wide open.
ReplyDeleteAlicia, I have this idea that it gets better if and when there's a new spouse in the picture. I'm imagining that my loneliness would be assuaged, and though B's real father can never come back, at least she's got someone to play the role. Do you think I'm setting myself up for disappointment in this?
ReplyDelete